Most cheaters have several personality traits that distinguish them from other people. The traits can range from being extremely flirtatious to compulsively lying. The better a spouse can identify the personality traits of a cheater, the better chance of preventing a cheater from having an affair.
Flirtatious – Flirty behavior is not always an indication that a person is a cheater, but it does indicate that the person loves attention and most cheaters are avid attention-seekers. People who practice infidelity are often insecure and seek the attention to alleviate their insecurities. Flirtatious behavior is often used to kick start chemistry which has the potential to evolve into infidelity.
Manipulating – A cheater must psychologically manipulate the person they are cheating on in order to keep the affair from being discovered. Being manipulative is a craft that most cheaters have developed. Cheaters who are not manipulative are normally caught quickly which is why many cheaters have developed the art of manipulation.
Compulsive Lying – Most cheaters double as compulsive liars. A compulsive liar is a person that has made such a habit of lying that lies affect every part of their life. Compulsive liars have an incredible urge to tell lies to themselves and others. Cheaters double as compulsive liars in order to hide their affairs from their significant other. Being a compulsive liar doesn’t necessarily mean a person is a cheater, and being a cheater doesn’t always mean that a person is a compulsive liar. It should be noted that compulsive lying and deception are two personality traits of a cheater.
Deception – cheater can cheat on someone and look them in the eye like nothing happened.
Narcissism – A narcissist feels entitled to whatever they can take. They feel entitled enough to exploit other people for their own needs and pleasures. A narcissist is very selfish and greedy, which equates to the personality of a cheater.
Most often cheaters are narcissists, or at the very least they share many similar qualities with them. For example, they are selfish, greedy and often think only of themselves. A narcissist typically feels a sense of entitlement and will do whatever necessary to feed the “narcissistic supply.” Wikipedia defines “narcissistic supply” as
“a concept in some psychoanalytic theories, which describes a type of admiration, interpersonal support or sustenance drawn by an individual from his or her environment (especially from careers, codependents and others). The term is typically used in a negative sense, describing a pathological or excessive need for attention or admiration that does not take into account the feelings, opinions or preferences of other people.”
Selfishness – Those who may not identify as narcissists but still place a higher value on their own feelings than those of others are more likely to cheat.
“These people can recognise that it might hurt their partner, and they recognise that it might be a deal breaker for the relationship, but the need to satisfy their own needs and thoughts can override everything else,” Manning says.
The problem here is that once you put yourself ahead of your partner once you’re more likely to do so again in the future.
“For many cheating once almost breaks the seal,” Manning says. “Those who have cheated before find themselves able to do it again because they’ve done it before and know the world didn’t stop.”
– Many cheaters suffer from abandonment syndrome and are actually afraid of being alone. The fear they have of being alone might compel them to seek out a second relationship as added security. A cheater may have been abandoned by family or a past lover and translates that fear through extra-marital affairs. Insatiable – Having a personality trait of being insatiable means that a person is never satisfied. Some cheaters are never satisfied emotionally, sexually, or mentally and are constantly looking for new and more fulfillment from additional relationships. It is not possible to fulfill the desires of an insatiable person, so a cheater who has the personality trait of insatiability has a high probability of compulsive cheating.
Insecurity – The very thing they desire is the thing that causes them to cheat in the first place. Their fear of being alone is so huge that they need a backup plan; they need to know that someone is always available to them. Often you may feel that your spouse’s emotionally dependency on you is so high that they would never risk losing you by having an affair. But the catch here is that their insecurity is so strong that they need to seek out extra-marital affairs to ensure that they never feel alone or insignificant.
Because they have a problem accepting things as they are, they tend to have highly insecure feelings and a continuous urge for validation. Whenever they become insecure, they are likely to cheat. If you find a person highly insecure and yet acting too confident, be careful.
Lack of Respect – A person who is bound to cheat will probably not respect you as a person. This behavior will be very evident with all of the people in the cheater’s life.
Jealous – Many cheaters are extremely jealous and insecure. The jealousy that is displayed towards their spouse is normally a reflection of their own unfaithfulness. A cheater begins to develop the mindset that everyone is cheating because that is what they are doing. A jealous cheater will often accuse their significant other of having affair, even when the significant other is completely innocent.
Power – People in a position of power are more likely to cheat. Power increases one’s confidence, leading powerful individuals to act in more assertive and outgoing ways. Powerful people are more likely to make direct eye contact, strike a confident pose, and approach potential lovers. Power influences the likelihood of cheating for both men and women
Understanding the personality traits of a cheater doesn’t have to be a difficult task. Most cheaters have at least a few of the above mentioned personality traits. The traits are not difficult to recognize when viewed with clarity.